Friday, December 9, 2016
This afternoon I saw my oldest daughter off on a trip to the Czech Republic..many miles away! From the time this child was 3 she was very aware of her Savior, even before her father or I were. She was mesmerized by Sunday school and Christian music. She would ask every Sunday for me to take her to church and eventually was the driving force for her dad to join us. In those churches is where we heard the gospel message and truly gave our lives to the Lord. In Kindergarten, the teachers had nicknamed her little Mother Theresa because she was so compassionate. I remember one day when she was 5 we lived in New Hampshire and she informed me that she wanted to go to the end of the drive way and spread out her arms and sing one of her favorite Christian songs so everyone would know God. In my infancy of being a Christian, I remember being slightly mortified at the thought of our neighbors thinking we were culty or weird.... Many times we would have the talk before we left somewhere, sometimes people don't want to talk about Jesus so lets not talk about religion when we are there OK? and she would look at me with these big eyes and look utterly confused by my double standards. Luckily she was spiritually more mature than me and my misguided attempts never squelched this girl's love for the Lord. Now 13 years later she is going very far away to share who God has made her and I couldn't be more proud. It has not been easy for her to get to that point, she has struggled with anxiety her whole life and a trip with a friend that far away would have seemed impossible a few years ago, but she has grown so much.
As I watched her and her sweet friend load up their suitcases full of their lives to go and share with others, it made me think about our heavenly father and how he must feel similar as he watches his creation go and take on the world. Its hard to let them be who they are meant to be when you know the world is full of things designed to discourage, hurt or disappoint them. That instinct is to protect but you also know they cannot fulfill their purpose unless you let go. They have to choose it for themselves if it is to become precious to them. Something so loving cannot be forced, it must always be chosen. Those times I have wondered, why did God let me wind up in this place, or when I look at my past and wish I had chosen differently I can now see God was walking alongside the entire time and allowing those moments so that I could fully choose, so I could become what he designed. Just like watching my beautiful daughter and her beautiful friend step out and choose what they love and choose to share it.
She was God's long before she was mine and someday someone lucky will have her as his too. A true gift she is to me!! I can just imagine how God must feel for each us, he is our gift and if we chose we are his!